STEPS TO FIND A BORN AGAIN SPOUSE

It is a good thing that a believer should have a godly wife. Outside of salvation in Jesus Christ, a godly wife brings more joy, peace, blessing and happiness to a man than anything else on earth.

As the Scripture says, in the book of Proverb 31:10 – 30 10 "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. 
13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. 15 She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. 16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. 18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. 19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. 21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. 25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. 26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. 31 Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate."

What man does not want to find that? A woman that he can trust with every ounce of his being. An honest woman of upright integrity that desires her husband’s success. But where does a man begin if he wants to find a woman like that? Where does he start to begin the search for a woman of such value? By no means is this list exhaustive, nor or these necessarily in order of importance, the following point will guide you on how to get a noble wife that comes from God:

Pursue the Lord with all of your heart

This might seem contrary to the objective, but it is actually primary in reaching it. Before a man finds a godly woman, he first finds the living God. He begins to long to glorify Jesus Christ with his life and sees Christ as infinitely valuable and worth all of his time and energy 1 Corinthians 10:31. A godly woman will not settle for anything less! She wants a man that could be a spiritual leader for her, a man that she can respect 1 peter 3:1. So be a man after God’s own heart and don’t look back and God will give you a wife of a noble character.

Know your value in Christ

Your value is found in the fact that you are created in God’s image and that if you are a believer in Christ, God loves you as much as his beloved Son John 17:23. If you are seeking your validity or worth in a woman, you will not find a godly woman, because you will be looking for qualities that the world esteems rather than the qualities that God esteems. Rather, you must find your value in God’s love for you displayed at the cross of Calvary.

Pray every day for a godly wife

If you are not praying for a godly woman, do not expect God to bring you one. The scripture say in the book of Matthew 7:7 “Ask and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you:” Seek the Lord in prayer and ask him to bring you a godly woman. It is OK to do that. Remember, you are asking the Lord for “a good thing.” Not a bad thing. And as Jesus reminds us, “How much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him” Matthew 7:11! Also, pray for wisdom and discernment. God is more than willing to give that to you as well if you will ask him for it James 1:5 – 8. Also, start praying for your future wife. Pray for her protection and her own growth in godliness. Prov.19:14 says, "A prudent wife is from the Lord." Ask God for a prudent wife

Search the Scriptures

Read the Scriptures daily and God will give you wisdom, and the Holy Spirit will use the Word to transform and renew your mind to be more like Christ’s Romans 12:1-2. You will read passages like Proverb 31 and Titus 2, and you will see and learn about what God considers to be a godly woman. A vision for what type of woman God is leading you to will begin to form in your mind as you listen to the Word of God. Most importantly, your own heart and character will begin to become more like Christ’s.

Join a church

Do not just attend a church. Join a church. And by joining a church, I mean a church where the Word is taught as the inerrant and infallible Word of God, where the Word is taught and preached, where the Gospel of Jesus Christ is cherished, and where people are on mission to bring the Gospel to the world. Not only will your relationships with other believers be edifying and challenging, you will now be surrounded by other godly men and women who will pour themselves into your life. Also, this should be obvious, but church is where the godly women are! If you want to see a football game, you go to the football stadium. If you want to find a godly girl, go to a church.

Embrace God’s call on your life

A godly woman wants a vision that is bigger than her. She wants to join a man on mission that is doing something with his life. She wants to be a part of something special. It is your job to figure out what this is. What are you to do with your life? Where are you to go? How are you going to invest in building the kingdom of God?

Work hard

A godly woman does not want to marry a lazy man. She wants to marry a hard worker whom she can respect. She’s looking for a Proverb 22:29 man: “Do you see a man skillful in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men.” This means that it is time to put away childish things—like playing Call of Duty for hours every night—and for you to become good at something! Take ownership and pride in your work and work hard. Strive to become the best at what you do.

Work on yourself also

Work on making yourself the sort of person that a godly Christian would LIKE to marry. Be kind, reliable, courteous and attractive. Have your life disciplined and godly and in reasonably good order. Be full of love.

Have something interesting about you and work on it. You need to stand out from the crowd a little. Get interested in missions, help the poor, do something different that is still you. 

Be godly yourself. Have a daily quiet time where you read the Bible and pray and start putting Scripture into practice in your life. Go to church regularly to worship God and switch off your "partner searching periscope" when you go there. In fact switch it off as often as you can. There is something very unattractive about people who are obviously looking for a partner. Godly people want a godly partner. 

May God bless you with a home that you celebrate for his glory in Jesus name.

By William Augustine